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Parenting skills: How to set rules and regulations for your teenager


Teaching your teenager to become a caring and responsible adult is never easy. But, instilling a key concept of self-esteem and positive disciple to a child can come in handy in their teenagehood.

In setting rules and consequences, it is wise to let your teenager know that any decision they make could have either a positive or a negative consequence. This will help them have self-discipline.

Here are some parenting skills you could borrow when setting rules and consequences for your teenager.

Be kind

Avoid lecturing the teenager on their shortcoming by shouting at them. Such tones of sarcasm and disrespectful tones can instil in them a sense of shame or make them develop a defensive mechanism towards correction. Let your tone be necessary and nonjudgmental.

Be kind and use the right tone, but be firm when correcting them. Let them understand their mistake and why it has a consequence.

Be clear and straightforward.

Set the rules short and precise. Make consequences that link directly to the teenager’s action. Instead of telling them,” don’t get late,” set a specific curfew time and ask them to adhere to it.


Be firm and consistent

Establish clear boundaries and stick to them. Been consistent or having predictable expectations towards your teenager helps them develop a sense of safety. Also, set a good example to your teenager, follow instructions and avoid making the same mistakes you punish them for. Children learn by watching their guardians.

Be positive

It is not all the time the teenager will be wrong. Applaud them when they do it right. Let them know that positive actions can enable them to make a positive impact in the world.

Avoid Ultimatums

 The tone of finality can act as a challenge to the teenager. If the broken rule is not well explained to the teenager they can interpret it as a challenge and act against it.

Explain your decision

 Teenagers might respond well to a rule when they accurately understand it and what is its purpose. For example: instead of telling them not to be late, let them understand why been late can jeopardize their safety.

Be flexible

If your teenager shows more sense of responsibility and is obedient to set rules, grant them more freedom. It helps develop their sense of responsibility. However, if the teenager shows rebellion against rules impose more restrictions and let them understand that choices have consequences.